{"id":342,"date":"2012-11-28T09:14:37","date_gmt":"2012-11-28T09:14:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/"},"modified":"2012-11-28T09:14:37","modified_gmt":"2012-11-28T09:14:37","slug":"cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/","title":{"rendered":"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Acest articol este scris de Alice Buiculescu.<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

“Ce bine ar fi dac\u0103 \u00een toate \u0219colile din lume, elevii \u0219i-ar antrena eul pentru a \u00een\u021belege c\u0103 orice alegere con\u021bine \u0219i pierderi, c\u0103 obiectivul maturit\u0103\u021bii psihice reprezint\u0103 mai mult dec\u00e2t s\u0103 c\u00e2\u0219tigi \u00eentr-o disput\u0103, \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103-l c\u00e2\u0219tigi sau s\u0103-l cucere\u0219ti pe cel\u0103lalt!<\/p>\n

O minte prost antrenat\u0103 poate transforma rela\u021biile sociale, \u00eentr-un infern f\u0103r\u0103 sf\u00e2r\u0219it”
Augusto Cury.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Dar care sunt acele ac\u021biuni pe care trebuie s\u0103 le faci pentru a avea rela\u021bii de calitate?<\/p>\n

1. Curajul de a vorbi<\/h2>\n

C\u00e2nd apar primele semne c\u0103 rela\u021bia cu partenera(ul) sau cu un coleg(\u0103) de serviciu, \u00eencepe s\u0103 devin\u0103 conflictual\u0103, tendin\u021ba este de a te retrage \u00een carapace \u0219i de a \u021bine sup\u0103rarea \u00een t\u0103cere.<\/p>\n

Dup\u0103 c\u00e2teva experien\u021be de acet gen cu aceea\u0219i persoan\u0103, sup\u0103rarea se transform\u0103 \u00een frustrare (c\u0103 nu e\u0219ti \u00een\u021beles, c\u0103 nu mai e\u0219ti iubit cu aceeasi intensitate, c\u0103 nu \u021bi se acord\u0103 suficient\u0103 aten\u021bie).<\/p>\n

Dar c\u00e2nd aceste experien\u021be se repet\u0103 aproape zilnic, rela\u021bia \u00eencepe s\u0103 devin\u0103 toxic\u0103 \u0219i la primul conflict mai aprins fiecare dintre cei implica\u021bi \u00een rela\u021bie, va da drumul frustr\u0103rilor, iar cuvintele grele sunt spuse pe ner\u0103suflate \u0219i din nefericire nu mai pot fi luate \u00eenapoi. Acestea vin ca o eliberare a sufletului \u00eenc\u0103rcat de frustr\u0103ri, dar aceast\u0103 eliberare aduce o lini\u0219te de moment care nu face dec\u00e2t sa dea timp pentru amplificarea tensiunilor din rela\u021bie.<\/p>\n

Pentru a avea rela\u021bii de calitate cu cei din jur este bine s\u0103 vorbe\u0219ti din timp, \u00eenc\u0103 de c\u00e2nd problema se afla \u00een stadiul de s\u0103m\u00e2n\u021b\u0103.<\/p>\n

Felul \u00een care expui situa\u021bia este de asemenea important.<\/p>\n

\u00centotdeauna c\u00e2nd expui problema, f\u0103 referire la persoana ta: “mi-ar pl\u0103cea s\u0103; a\u0219 fi apreciat dac\u0103\u2026”<\/p>\n

\u0219i folose\u0219te-te de calm.<\/p>\n

Nu ar\u0103ta cu degetul c\u0103tre persoana care consideri c\u0103 este vinovat\u0103. Evit\u0103 \u00eentotdeauna s\u0103 \u00eel subliniezi pe TU: “Tu niciodat\u0103 nu faci; tu ai spus c\u0103\u2026”<\/p>\n

Ascult\u0103 \u0219i opinia celuilat, \u00eencerc\u00e2nd sa te deta\u0219ezi \u00een afara problemei ca s\u0103 po\u021bi analiza situa\u021bia mai bine.<\/p>\n

Crezi c\u0103 ai putea ca atunci c\u00e2nd porne\u0219ti o dicu\u021bie, s\u0103 pleci \u00een minte cu urmatoarele cuvinte?<\/p>\n

“Scopul argumenta\u021biei sau al discu\u021biei nu trebuie s\u0103 fie victoria, ci progresul.”
– Joseph Joubert<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

2. Recunoa\u0219te c\u0103 \u0219i tu ai gre\u0219it<\/h2>\n

Cu to\u021bii gre\u0219im, chiar \u0219i atunci c\u00e2nd credem c\u0103 avem dreptate. Nu po\u021bi vedea niciodat\u0103 100% din perspectiva celuilalt.<\/p>\n

Poate c\u0103 ai dreptate c\u0103 ai transmis mesajul 100% corect, dar c\u00e2t din cei 100% a fost \u00een\u021beles corect de interlocutor.<\/p>\n

Aici intervine ne\u00een\u021belegerea de cele mai multe ori. Eu cred c\u0103 am transmis informa\u021bia corect\u0103, dar nu m\u0103 asigur c\u0103 cel care o preia a \u00een\u021beles cu adev\u0103rat ceea ce vreau s\u0103 transmit.<\/p>\n

De aceea, \u00eentreab\u0103-\u021bi interlocutorul dac\u0103 mai are nevoie \u0219i de alte detalii \u0219i ofer\u0103-\u021bi \u00eentotdeauna disponibilitatea de a-l ajuta atunci c\u00e2nd simte c\u0103 se distan\u021beaz\u0103 de scopul discu\u021biei.<\/p>\n

Recunoa\u0219te c\u0103 gre\u0219eala este uman\u0103 \u0219i c\u0103 \u0219i tu gre\u0219e\u0219ti \u00een multe \u00eemprejur\u0103ri. \u00ce\u021bi mai aminte\u0219ti cum te sim\u021beai atunci c\u00e2nd ai gre\u0219it?<\/p>\n

“Recunosc\u00e2ndu-\u021bi deschis gre\u0219elile, limpeze\u0219ti atmosfera \u0219i trimi\u021bi un mesaj important despre responsabilitate”
\u2013 Bruce Hyland<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

3. Hot\u0103r\u00e2rea de a te schimba pe tine insu\u021bi<\/h2>\n

Odat\u0103 ce \u00ee\u021bi recuno\u0219ti gre\u0219elile, vei \u00eencepe s\u0103 con\u0219tientizezi c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 schimbi ceva \u00een comportamentul t\u0103u.<\/p>\n

Vei realiza c\u0103 schimb\u00e2ndu-te pe tine, \u00eei vei schimba \u0219i pe cei din jur. Evident c\u0103 vor fi persoane care nu vor dori s\u0103 se schimbe, dar nu vor mai \u021bine pasul cu “noul tu”
\u0219i atunci drumurile se vor separa pentru binele am\u00e2ndurora.<\/p>\n

Schimbarea necesit\u0103 timp, mult\u0103 introspec\u021bie \u0219i analiz\u0103 a modului \u00een care reac\u021bionzi \u00een rela\u021bii.<\/p>\n

“Nimeni nu poate convinge pe altul s\u0103 se schimbe. Fiecare dintre noi st\u0103 de paz\u0103 la o u\u0219\u0103 a transform\u0103rii – care nu poate fi deschis\u0103 dec\u00e2t pe din\u0103untru. Nu putem deschide u\u0219a altuia nici prin argumente ra\u021bionale, nici prin seduc\u021bie sentimental\u0103<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Exista un pasaj in cartea “Min\u021bi sclipitoare, min\u021bi antrenate”<\/a><\/strong> scris\u0103 de Augusto Cury care mi-a atras atentia \u0219i care m-a determinat s\u0103 scriu acest articol.<\/p>\n

Instrumentele revelate \u00een acest pasaj sunt extrase din extraordinara idee: “Iube\u0219te-ti aproapele ca pe tine insu\u021bi”<\/em> \u0219i cred c\u0103 ne pot ajuta s\u0103 facem o analiz\u0103 asupra vie\u021bii tr\u0103ite p\u00e2n\u0103 acum astfel \u00eenc\u00e2t s\u0103 putem da startul pentru \u00eembun\u0103t\u0103\u021birea comportamentului fa\u021b\u0103 de cei din jur:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Cine nu se iube\u0219te pe sine, nu-i va iubi niciodata profund, pe cei cu care rela\u021bioneaz\u0103.<\/li>\n
  2. Cine se autopedepse\u0219te, nu va fi tolerant cu ceilal\u021bi.<\/li>\n
  3. Cine cere prea mult de la el insu\u0219i, va fi extrem de exigent cu ceilal\u021bi.<\/li>\n
  4. Cine nu-\u0219i respect\u0103 week-end-ul \u0219i nici patul, va r\u0103sp\u00e2ndi nelini\u0219tea \u0219i cu greu \u00eei va \u00eenv\u0103\u021ba pe cei dragi s\u0103 se relaxeze.<\/li>\n
  5. Cine nu are grija de calitatea vie\u021bii sale, va fi mai pu\u021bin preg\u0103tit pentru a avea grij\u0103 de a celorlal\u021bi.<\/li>\n
  6. Cine este propriul s\u0103u c\u0103l\u0103u, cu greu va fi generos cu ceilal\u021bi.<\/li>\n
  7. Cine nu-\u0219i alimenteaz\u0103 propria stim\u0103 de sine, cu greu \u00eei va ajuta pe ceilal\u021bi s\u0103-\u0219i transforme e\u0219ecurile, \u00een prilejuri de dezvoltare personal\u0103.<\/li>\n
  8. Cine \u00ee\u0219i \u00eengroap\u0103 visele, va deveni un specialist \u00een a \u00eenmorm\u00e2nta visele celorlal\u021bi.<\/li>\n
  9. Cine \u00ee\u0219i trece lacrimile sub t\u0103cere, anevoie le va acorda celorlal\u021bi, libertatea de a-\u0219i pl\u00e2nge durerea.<\/li>\n
  10. Cine nu-\u0219i d\u0103 sie\u0219i o nou\u0103 \u0219ans\u0103, va avea o slab\u0103 capacitate de a-i stimula pe ceilal\u021bi s\u0103 ia totul de la cap\u0103t<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Acest articol este scris de Alice Buiculescu. “Ce bine ar fi dac\u0103 \u00een toate \u0219colile din lume, elevii \u0219i-ar antrena eul pentru a \u00een\u021belege c\u0103 orice alegere con\u021bine \u0219i pierderi, c\u0103 obiectivul maturit\u0103\u021bii psihice reprezint\u0103 mai mult dec\u00e2t s\u0103 c\u00e2\u0219tigi \u00eentr-o disput\u0103, \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103-l c\u00e2\u0219tigi sau s\u0103-l cucere\u0219ti pe cel\u0103lalt! O minte prost antrenat\u0103 poate […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1021,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nCum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"1 Carte pe Saptamana\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/01\/cititul-te-face-sexy.jpg?fit=700%2C350&ssl=1\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"700\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"350\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"gabriel\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"gabriel\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/\",\"name\":\"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/c3be91083720f46e0ef4e85aa65aeb71\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103?\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/\",\"name\":\"1 Carte pe Saptamana\",\"description\":\"Carti bune si dezvoltare personala\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/c3be91083720f46e0ef4e85aa65aeb71\",\"name\":\"gabriel\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fe18f78b1f4ec037f6c64fbabd1191b7?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fe18f78b1f4ec037f6c64fbabd1191b7?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"gabriel\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/","og_locale":"en_GB","og_type":"article","og_title":"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana","og_url":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/","og_site_name":"1 Carte pe Saptamana","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/","article_published_time":"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00","og_image":[{"width":700,"height":350,"url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/01\/cititul-te-face-sexy.jpg?fit=700%2C350&ssl=1","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"gabriel","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"gabriel","Estimated reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/","url":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/","name":"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103? - 1 Carte pe Saptamana","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#website"},"datePublished":"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00","dateModified":"2012-11-28T09:14:37+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/c3be91083720f46e0ef4e85aa65aeb71"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/cum-gestionam-relatiile-cu-cei-din-jur-pentru-a-avea-o-viata-implinita\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Cum gestion\u0103m rela\u021biile cu cei din jur pentru a avea o via\u021b\u0103 \u00eemplinit\u0103?"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#website","url":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/","name":"1 Carte pe Saptamana","description":"Carti bune si dezvoltare personala","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/c3be91083720f46e0ef4e85aa65aeb71","name":"gabriel","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fe18f78b1f4ec037f6c64fbabd1191b7?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/fe18f78b1f4ec037f6c64fbabd1191b7?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"gabriel"}}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/01\/cititul-te-face-sexy.jpg?fit=700%2C350&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/342"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=342"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/342\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1021"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=342"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=342"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/1cartepesaptamana.ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=342"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}